How can one know
The difference
Reality blurred
Lines covered.
I have seemed
To lose myself
In rubbles of
Uncertainty
I can easily
Blame you/them
Identify as
Victim or anti
Hero, human.
Where passion
Eludes me
Sun no longer felt;
Not burning
Words hurting
More than ever
Ripping synapses
Before reaching thought.
I am clouded
Sleep and dream
Squinted.
There is the pain
Left behind
Which beckons to be
Acknowledged
This
And only this
Is true.
Many words left unsaid
How I wished to have had the courage to say
Choosing between the “right way”
The “best way”
Only lead to knots in my throat
So I’ll scream it out loud
Now that I am no longer heard
Basking in the beyond or in the middle
Peering up or down
I proclaim with vigor in my veins
You were the ever in everything
And with baited breath I professed
SILENCE
This silence wells my eyes
Inside the screaming
Never subsides
I wish to explain it all away
This, to be that, and so on
But birthing a thing
Gives light to its adverse
Oh… what shall I do
When my chest hurts in naivety
These bones cry with realities
As I stand painted smiles on the outside
The foundation crumbles
The fables no longer holding weight
The safety of childish years
Eradicates my joy
We push, and toil onwards
To where? Destinations darkness
I try desperately to remember before this time
To no avail
And once there, will I recall here?
In this I shall also fail … I presume
But, what if I want out of this enclosure ?
A break in its wall
Watch it all fall
Would it bring me the wonder of it all?
Ah… so many questions
As the one who holds the answers
Lays dormant and watches
As the silence and I become one in the same
IN THE BEGINNING
Your breath birthed life into the ashes of me
While the stars shined down annunaki
Tablets carved in Sumerian lands
Carried out of caves by Moses hands
We braved floods on wooden arks
While the fires of Kukulkan barked
Atabey sat in meditations
Siddhartha bathed in her libations
From Elegbas jicaras
And Shivas palms
I took a ride in Ezekiels wheel
Master Fard did reveal
Yahs ultimate plan
The holes in Isas hand
And in Shaytans deceptions
Yacubs grafted creations
17 million plus 2 million in North American total
Dancing to tamobores y coro
The tower brought confusion
In my soul divine wisdom
As above so below
I offer salat and Ochosis arrow and bow
A burning bush and a voice over Damascus
A warrior, shepherd, and pacifist
Young lord and Albizu
Rumi, Watts, Elijah, y Sankara, too
Hecho con todo amor y guerrilla
God of war, mixed con alegria
As such am I from the beginning
Rocket ship to nebula as I sing
Tocando bata a Eggun
A mi Papa, te veo… soon
AseO ✊🏼
Celebrate You
I wish to
celebrate you
Every accomplishment
And each failure
Elevate your spirit
Especially in the missteps
And stumbles
I wish to
Never see any fault in you
And not reserve judgements
Perceive only pure virtue
And intent in your ways
Go into prayer for you
Boast to the creator
Of all you’ve endured
I can assure
It hasn’t gone unnoticed
All the wins
And loses
A ceremony and all
Is what I ultimately wish for
Not sure what’s forgiveness
The moth attracted to light
Or streams to quench my soul
Holding on to final breaths
Scared, of the inevitable
Tingling on finger tips
I recall your eyes
Lord, are we worthy ?
Scrambling for a spot like butterflies
Tired of the fight
But know nothing more
Let me have a glimpse
Just stay, if you’re sure
That salvation is found
In the flickering down the hall
Last Night
You entered my dreams
Warm, vivid like
And I touched your hand
Softly, tender like
Your eyes were alive
Bursting in hue, life like
Caught in the moment
We laughed, child like
I shed a tear
Surreal, mournful like
For I knew it’s end
Over, fin like
Last night
Would it make things easier
For you?…
If I told you that I’m hurting
Also…
That demons torture me
Daily!
I think it’s best to continue playing
Unscarred.
Better for you and your tears to envision
Winning.
So I’ll bask in my own hell in order to soothe
Yours…
Asking every second, when will it end
To myself…
As I build you up, lying to you
About…
How splendid it all is, don’t you see?
I can’t …
When no one hears my cries…
Tell me!
Just to keep smiling beloved keep…
Smiling…. crookedly
Loved Me
I won’t apologize
Being the thief of a heart
Like leaves
Changing color in the winters
I was only reaching
Into something
I didn’t understand
But I wanted
What was you
Inside though
I always knew
You’d never be mine
And I’m forever guilty
Of this crime
In your mind
So with lifetimes apart
You’ll always hate me
For loving me
And I won’t apologize
I know what pain looks like
I know the tears that come from bloodshed
I know the heartache of loving and losing
I know the scratches that show up from bended knees at pulpits
I know the dark marks that are seen on prostrated foreheads
I know the scars that are carried by paleros
I know the blood trickle from the heads of santeros
I know vaguely the tranquil state of monks
I know sadly the wickedness of man
I know… which is why I hurt
Hurt
©Axel Garcia
Axel Garcia 