She Says

She says

I don’t look like me anymore

That the hunch in my back is more pronounced

Sunken, was the word she used

She says

my scars are in trenched deeper

Revealing my truer nature

She says

the cuadro espiritual that surrounds

My aura is too blinding with its brilliant hues

For her black and white ways

For she says she carries the blessing of Issa

Yeshua came to her in a misa

Blowing smoke in her face de el cigarro

Agua Ardiente balanced perfectly

In the other hand

Now replaced by the wine

But me

She says

No longer holds the blessing of the father

Like the baptismal waters drowning

The sins of her past

I am not worthy of her love

For she now is bonded by a holier spirit

His preaching more attractive than mine

His Gods holding more promise than mine

My devotions make her cringe with remorse

Of the times we’ve shared together

She says

that only his blood cleans away

The prints of my love off her body

Like holy water in an exorcism

So I wait in the shadows

Like the cypher of Lu

Wanting to shatter her doubts

Because though

She says

What she says

Her spirit still calls out to me

In the far reaches of her soul

Where only I can ever exist

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Crossroads

Crossroads

I flirt with the end

Balance beam everything

So I can feel Grace

It’s shame and blessing

Of exclusivity and at once excluding

A Child of crossroads

Playing hide and seek

This way or that

Loving and despising

The tightrope

Choking what is left and right

Closing my eyes

To recall the thrill

Of it all

The ease of which I bring

Sweet Suffering

To my doorstep

And to speak of boundless joy

I only toggle in its surrender

#newpoem #poetry

Ever-Changing

Ever changing am I

A chord progression in song

An ending of a season

The leaf that withers

And blooms as plant on the ground

I beg of you

Don’t seek to nail me down

Into this or that

I’ll fail each and every time

I always color outside the line

There is no reason nor tale to tell

Only awakening to today

And eternally resting yesterday

A froth of water to shore

Returning to its source

Such am I

Ever changing…. forevermore

Knowing

Somewhere right now

In another realm and time

I’m breathing your scent

Grasping your hand tightly

And Lord I pray

That I embrace that moment

Appreciate it fully

Knowing

What I know now

That this memory of you

Haunts my heart with sadness

Knowing

It can never be again